I Don't Take Coffee I Drink Tea My Dear . . .

Time for a few disconnected and random final thoughts on our trip to New York. (Although this was posted after I returned home - and yet appears out of sequence and not as the last posting as intended - all my thoughts here were written actually on my last night in New York.)

I've seen the New York Subway system enough times in movies but seeing it in reality came as something of a shock. I mean, would it be that hard to update it to something like -say - the 1960s. Or even the eighties.

Not long before I came away on holiday I travelled on the London Underground and went on  one of their new trains that has the really wide open connection between the carriages. By contrast the NY trains seem to have been made in the fifties. So old, so tired, and interiors made of cheap and nasty plastic materials.

Oh - and don't start me on the stations. Dark, unattractive, with lines of pillars along the platform edge specially designed to give muggers somewhere to hide. No information system on most of the stations - just stand there and wait patiently, hoping a train might turn up sometime in the foreseeable future.

And so few stations have any obvious access for disabled.

I'd be impressed if they could bring the system into the twentieth century - gobsmacked if they made it into the twenty-first!



Now - my next subject is in no way a criticism, just an observation built on one of Tania's throw-away remarks. Considering just how many times places we went to were being refurbished I can see what Tania was thinking when she said "It seems most of New York is held up by scaffolding!" Not hard to see where she was coming from. So many buildings have covered scaffolding along the walkway - but there is no obvious work being done. You seldom walk more than three blocks without navigating some scaffold structure.

They say the Mafia had/has control of gambling, drugs, etc, but I'm telling you if I was part of that organisation I would press for control of scaffolding!



Hotels, now, and not just American ones. In all hotels I've stayed in they go to some trouble to have the toilet rolls start with a pointed sheet.

Why??

My younger niece studied Tourism and Leisure. I am left wondering whether they devote a week or two to the art of pointed toilet paper. It's so universal there must be world-wide training in it.

(I have been told it's a sign that the place has been cleaned and prepared. So why not just write "All good - pull from here" on the first sheet.)



One of the biggest disappointments to me was the New York people. I mean, they were all so friendly. Really helpful. Unfailingly polite. Genuinely nice people - apart from when they're on the move, then, whether driving or as pedestrians, they become very impatient, moving forwards quickly, and certainly not suffering fools or sluggards gladly.

But - apart from when on the move they turned out to be really nice people.

I was really expecting them to be rude, sarcastic and aggressive. Imagine my sense of disappointment that they were so, so nice!

And here's a thing for you to ponder. For our trip to Pittsburgh we put our large cases in Left Luggage at Penn Station and travelled light. Made sense.

When we got back to New York we went to claim our cases back. Gave the fella behind the counter our ticket and off he went to retrieve them. That's when we noticed a beaker full of dollar notes on the counter - their collection of tips. I don't know how many times we saw the counter unattended over the days we went there - it was more than a few - but that beaker just sat right on the front edge of the counter. How long do you think that would last before being pinched in the UK??



Have to confess we have been lucky with the weather here. Just one really wet and windy day in New York. And that was when we were in Pittsburgh! For us it has been pretty much warm and mostly sunny the whole way.



Finally, my last thought as I get ready to leave the United States is a major concern that I will be charged for excess weight on my return flight. You see, I will be bringing back a very much larger tummy with me. Too many pancakes with bacon and maple syrup. Or large burgers. Or sunny-side up eggs. And those things they call biscuits and we would call scones.

Lightship near Pier 17 - perfect for a certain poser!

So long New York. We enjoyed coming to see you, loved your fiendishly tall buildings - favourite has to be the beautiful Chrysler Building, it's gorgeous - and loved your people. Loved the challenge of mastering your creaking, ancient subway system in a perverse way. New York is really special.

But we won't be back. Simply, there are other places to see and we don't have enough years of life left to see them all.

But we will remember your city for years to come.

I don't take coffee, I take tea my dear
I like my toast done on one side
You can hear it in my accent when I talk
I'm an Englishman in New York

Whoa-oh, I'm an alien, I'm a legal alien
I'm an Englishman in New York . . . . .